That's All, Folks....

Not unexpectedly, our confused bachelor just became a thing of the past. Let me bring you up to speed....

So, after I told him to back off until he had resolved things with whoever this other girl is. He backed off for about 48 hours. We saw each other that Friday and then chatted all week long. It was nice.

On Friday I went up to Wisconsin to see one of my best friends get married. The wedding was great! Very beautiful and moving. I had a great time. On Friday he was texting me on the way up there and was getting kind of ... ahem, frisky.... in his messages. I was excited! He seemed to actually be interested in seeing me (I know, as I'm writing this I'm thinking to myself that feeling that this guy is ACTUALLY interested in seeing me is a terrible sign) so we made a plan for this (Sunday) evening.

I got home a little while ago and touched base with him to see what time he wanted to meet up. He avoided the question, so I just said that I would just let him know when I was done running errands. Then, after a long silence, he sent the following text back to me:

"I think perhaps you should make other plans. I'm just really not myself. Getting together probably wouldn't be right for either of us."

#1: Do NOT tell me what's right for me. I tell YOU what's right for me. Do not try to put whatever this is onto me by implying that you're protecting me from doing something bad.

#2: You're an asshole.

Now I've tried my best not to lash out at this guy and to cut him some slack. He seems like he's gone through a lot in his life (and even within the past few weeks) and he really needed someone to lean on. But this is just ridiculous. It seems to me that he's just been using me to fill whatever this emotional void is that he has at the moment and isn't really all that interested in me as a person. Well screw that.

I of course called him immediately upon getting this text and (since, of course, he did not answer) left him a message. I said that it seems like he's not really interested in seeing me... and that I can't continue to invest emotionally in him if that is the case. So, I'm going to stop communicating with him... and he should call me if - and ONLY if - he actually wants to see me.

If I'm honest with myself, this is the better outcome. He seems like the type of person who just likes to wallow in his problems and make no effort to feel happy or work it out. I'm not that person. I want to find a partner who is kind and caring and who wants me to be happy and will allow me to make him happy, too. I don't want to constantly be picking the person I'm with up off the floor and desperately trying to make him happy. It's not my job. My job is to listen and comfort and be there in the bad times.... but also to create good times and experience those good times with my partner as often as possible. I'm not going to tail after some guy who is just not interested in having any good times... its just not worth my time.

Now... back to trolling profiles for the next first date!